Tales from the Middle of Nowhere--A Nun’s Tale

(names are changed, of course!)

   Every town has a hero or heroine and this little town’s heroine was an elementary school teacher and she had once been a nun.  Her family was considered a ‘native’ of the town…generations had lived there.  I came to know her story as the years went by; you go to the some of the same meetings and parties and chat; sometimes you learn interesting things.  Lily grew up in a large family of several sisters and brothers.  She was bright, lively, and devout; and she wanted an education and a profession.  Although getting into a college for an Hispanic in that state was not too difficult even in the early 1960’s; she went another route.  Since she was a devout Catholic, eager and smart, she made it into a Catholic convent school back East.  The little town had sent her off to the convent with fanfare.  They were very proud of her.  She told me once, that that time was one of the most joy filled of her life.  Life at the convent was so unlike living in the little town—an adventure!  It was ‘like living in a boarding school’.  The rules were not harsh or mean and neither were her teachers or the nun’s who ran the convent.  She received her teaching certificate and she looked forward to life as a nun and a teacher. 

   She told me once that she never knew why she was sent to the convent at Santa Fe.  Perhaps it was that she was bilingual, perhaps it was to teach her patience and self-control, perhaps she was meant to be herself.  The convent there had hundreds of years of tradition and piety to bring down upon the shoulders of a young lady of twenty.  Silence was the rule and speaking freely a rare exception.  Hard physical work was the rule.  There was no school.  There was a harshness and coldness that almost broke her. One gained heaven by self-denial and obedience.  Lily did try to fit into a prison made of stout walls, silent air, an awful loneliness.  Faith was not the problem for her. Her faith never wavered--never a doubt--always a comfort.  Her body took over from the brain and from the heart and rebelled.  Lily developed an ulcer and it began to bleed.  As the months went by, her health became worse to the point that she needed more medical care and hospitalization.  Her family was distressed and pressed her to make a break, to come home.  With the open support of her family and doctors, she was able to work through the process of writing to the Vatican and a dispensation was granted.  She recovered slowly and when well enough began the journey home.  She told me that of all that had happened coming home was the worst.  She had let her church and faith down, she had let the town down, she had let her family down.  They would think her a terrible person.  I can’t remember if she arrived on the bus or the train.  She was miserable and weak.  But as she started to climb down the steps, there was a sight to see.  The whole town was there with her family--- not there to jeer or to laugh and not to cast  judgment--- but to cheer her homecoming.  She had come home to them, and they were joyful.  They enfolded her in love, their own beloved little nun. 

   She settled down to teaching at the local school.  Every parent wanted their children to be in her class.  She was firm and fair, lively and modern.  Children learned and worked hard and loved every minute.  She expected parents to participate in the education of their own children--- not an easy wish in a town with no industry, little future, and lots of welfare.  In the little town, it was the custom of mothers to love and spoil their children, feed them, to clothe them, but to teach them little.  That convent in Santa Fe had taught her patience, had taught her self-control, had given her a core of steel wrapped in determination.   

   It was during my first year in that little town that Lily got a boyfriend.  Oh, there had been the wanna bee’s but asking an ex-nun out on a date was terrifying.  Very few got a first date and more than one date was rare.  The first time I ever saw Lily socially was at a private party hosted by a teacher for other teachers. She was sitting on the sofa, shyly hold hands with Danny.  Danny had one of the few good paying jobs working for the state at the truck weigh station.  He was a short slim man, already going bald.  He was a quiet man, an honest man, devout and devoted to Lily, perfect for her. Years later, he admitted getting to hold her hand was an accomplishment—getting to the first kiss took a looonnng time.  But he was in love and he had the patience to court her one little step at a time.  I think they were the longest engaged couple that little town had ever encountered.    Their wedding was a Town Event, and pictures of it are in the school yearbook.  Somewhere, someone had found an old wagon and painted it white and decorated it with flowers for that day.  I can see her yet, riding on it, her veil blowing in the wind, the townspeople filling the church grounds, cheering her and Danny.  By and by as married people do, they had a baby boy. 

   Years pass for us all and I and my spouse and daughter moved away from that little town.  We did return once for a few years, but times were hard and so we moved away again for good.  I lost touch with friends in that little town.  My fault entirely, but that’s another story.  The years, sometimes flying, sometimes stumbling by, and I found myself at my computer greeting strangers in a game.  Now, certain states are very large in land area and small in population and very strange things have happened to me at times online. You get to talking about places and the conversation takes some twists and suddenly you hear, ‘Yes, I live in -----------’  “Yes, I had a boyfriend from that little town.  It was a while ago when I was in college.  He lives there now, he’s a fireman.’--- ‘Ah, yes, I remember him.  I remember when he was born.  His mother had been a nun.’  ‘Yes, that’s him! Would you like to see a picture of him?’…..and so it went---full circle for me.   I don’t how or when or why…it doesn’t really matter; little town heroine, little nun, salt of the earth of the purest kind…now an angel in heaven.